On the Road Again!

Guess what I have now? A driver's license. Not only that, I have a truck and I feel like I am almost human now. Next step, get a better job. Stay tuned.

Photos of Nate the Great

My favorite little man will be three on the 30th of the month. Wow! So hard to believe. What is the best gift I can give him? Time. I am trying so hard to quit smoking cigarettes, so I will have that time to give him. Just look at him!

Wish me luck and pray for me to find the strength to overcome this addiction.

Life is returning ever so slowly to normal. So close to being able to drive again. I will be going to get my license on 6/8/07 ~ I hope. I have got a truck, insurance and my reinstatement fees paid. I have to take both the skills test and the written test.

George Carlin's Proposal to Solve Two Problems

I thought this was too funny and a very, very good idea:

Bush wants us to cut the amount of gas we use. The best way to stop using so much gas is to deport 11 million illegal immigrants! That would be 11 million less people using our gas. The price of gas would come down. Bring our troops home from Iraq to guard the border. When they catch an illegal immigrant crossing the border, hand him a canteen, rifle and some ammo and ship him to Iraq. Tell him if he wants to come to America then he must serve a tour in the military. Give him a soldier's pay while he's there and tax him on it. After his tour, he will be allowed to become a citizen since he defended this country. He will also be registered to be taxed and be a legal patriot. This option will probably deter illegal immigration and provide a solution for the troops in Iraq and the aliens trying to make a better life for themselves. If they refuse to serve, ship them to Iraq anyway, without the canteen, rifle or ammo. Problem solved. If you think this is a good solution to both of the problems, forward this onto your friends.

I am nearing the end of my ordeal with license and legal charges that I incurred last year. I have applied for the charges to be expunged and should be clear in about 4-6 weeks (county offices, jesh!) and my last ADSAP class is tomorrow. So, next week I will be getting a license - I have already received several unsolicited lectures as to the dangers of drinking and driving. I have endured this with very little grace and almost no patience. Thanks to my friends for listening to me whine for over a year. I love you guys - all three of you - with all my heart.

Feeling Better

I have resolved some of the issues that were involved in my last post, "Valentines Day Curse Strikes Again". The issues I resolved are mine, not Rick's. He is still holding on to the idea that I did the unforgivable. I know better.
We went to dinner and a movie last night. Had dinner at O'Charley's (passable) and went to see Ghost Rider (great effects and story). Very little discussion, but the little that was said I was able to maintain without emotions overcoming me. I basically told him that if he believed that I was honestly trying to reconcile with my ex then maybe we were wasting our time and all we had left was friendship; and maybe not even that. I also told him that since he called me his ex's name while drinking on several occasions, then maybe he really wanted to be with her and not me. He backed this up by saying at least I didn't call her and tell her I wanted to move to the area she was living. Whatever.
I am to the point that I don't care which way it goes, but I know I will not wait around forever for him to figure out what he can or cannot accept.
Other than all that, I am still searching for a job and it is the most frustrating process. I spend my days searching for a job and not much else. The weather here is great, nearly 70 every day and down in the 40's at night. Spring has sprung! Thank you God!

Valentines Curse Strikes Again

Now I remember why I hate Valentines Day. Even if this happened a few days after, it is just too close for comfort.

Rick overheard me speaking to Fannie's father and I was venting about him being controlling and overly jealous. I made a remark of how if things didn't work out I had been thinking about moving back to Columbia, SC. I have three children who live there and I lived there for 10 years. Since Rick heard this he has basically ended it with me and told me he cannot trust me and if I wanted to be with my ex then that is what I should do. I never said I was going back to my ex, just thinking of moving back to Columbia if things didn't work out. I had lunch with him today and he told me I might as well have had sex with someone else, cause a "knife in the heart feels the same either way". The reason I was venting....He called me his ex's name at a really awkward moment; if you get my drift. It hurt and maybe subconsciously I wanted to make him jealous. We were both drinking. I know now for 100% I cannot drink and lose control of my feelings. I have verified with my ex everything I thought I said was what I said and there was no misunderstanding that I was wanting to reconcile.

Rick has shown me several times how jealous he is and he is controlling. I have apologized for hurting his feelings, he says he has trust issues and cannot forget what I did. I don't know if what I did is so unforgivable. Yes, I should have talked to him and not someone else. If anyone out there has an idea let me know; please.

I am not sure it is worth working on if I am going to be punished for my mistakes like this. I was basically living with him, he promptly dropped me off at my mother's and told me the next day that he didn't think he would be able to work this out. We had lunch today and he made a date with me for Friday night. Why? I know I have to keep my emotions under control when I am around him. I am just waiting to see how this pans out.

How can you be so happy one day and the next day think it is not worth working out? Help!

Too bad the media didn't find this "newsworthy" - I DO!

I received an email from my Momma and wanted to pass it on here. Our troops get so much negative press and there has to be more stories like this happening over there everyday. I wonder if the support of the war would increase if items like this were made known and things like body counts were unknown. I support our troops one hundred percent, but I still believe a quote I heard once -"War doesn't prove whose right, it just proves whose left." I don't know who said it, as many movies as I watch it may just be a movie quote that stuck with me. I have always been of the mind that war is a necessary evil and I continue to pray for Peace, Love & Happiness for all.

Here is the link to that story:
http://www.wtv-zone.com/Mary/THISWILLMAKEYOUPROUD.HTML

Just keep swimming.....

Just about sums up my life right now; just keep swimming.
I am looking for a job again, I got laid off at Sonny's Camp N Travel on December 5, 2006. I was told there was not enough work for everyone that worked in the service department and since he had just hired his brother to "manage" the service department, I was going to be laid off. I miss it and I know I am missed as Rick is still struggling to get parts for his repairs when that was not an issue when I was there. If Rick is not getting his parts, then I am sure the other tech's are in the same situation.
I have three more classes left to complete my requirements for Pretrial Intervention. Then I can have all that expunged from my record and start looking at county jobs also. I get my license back on April 28, 2007 and then I get to pay for SR22 insurance for a few years. I have so learned my lesson. Driving is one of my favorite things to do and I so miss it. The only driving I do is on a golfcart now and that can only go as far as Jeannie's house.
Rick and I are doing good. It is so nice to be with someone who appreciates the little things I do for him. As he is going through a divorce, we try to be discrete about our relationship. I stay half the week at Mom's and the other half at his home in Bonneau.
Please keep the prayers coming and I love you all my friends.
PS>>I am so proud of Tony Dungy. He deserves his Super Bowl ring and all the glory that comes with it. A lot has being made of his gentleness and caring this week, and it makes me very proud to see a fine gentleman become a role model for our children. In recent years we have not always had good role models for our boys and I can honestly hope that that is changing now.